My Stonewall Campaign

Ok so, who remembers back in august that I mentioned going down to london. Well, as mentioned in the linked post, I went there to begin training as a Stonewall youth volunteer. For anyone who doesn't know Stonewall is the largest LGB charity in the country, the other young people and myself on the residential were tasked with creating and carrying out campaigns in our local areas which tackle the issues surrounding homophobic bullying.

That was august, it is now the end of November and still the school I approached with my campaign has not got back to me. I am taking it that they never will, my email must have been lost in the sands of the internet which I am most displeased about but I am not dissuaded from doing my duty and seeing my campaign through. At this point I am on board with two options, the first is to deliver my theatre workshop (which is the basis of my campaign) to the local scouts. They are the targeted age range of young people for my workshop and I also know the scout leader, so it should be a good warm up for the second option, I am going to hound the school until I get confirmed or denied for my workshop. I will not let them brush me aside.

My chosen school is my old one, Hawkley Hall High School in Wigan. I was bullied persistently there whilst I was a pupil and for some time after, and I have heard the situation has gotten better since I left but naturally I want to see for myself. I can relate a little better to the students there and probably them to me if I play my cards right. I am so sure I can nail this, I know I can get the message across in a way which doesn't make me a wanker to them and I think I am just the right age for me to still be cool in their eyes, if not cooler (because of the hair, yeah that's right, I'm playing the hair card.)

Wish me luck gang, all this preparation was the easy part, the hard part is making someone listen!

Review: How to Look Good Naked

Like many people, I watch How to Look Good Naked. I think it is a fantastic program existing for all the right reasons. At a glance most people would assume its just another gay fashion show focusing on women's bodies and whats 'hot or not' in the world clothing trends, but this couldn't be further from the truth.

I would urge as many people as possible to watch Naked, it delivers a message to all genders and sexualities about body confidence and how quite often we can be objective and prejudice, and self deprecating for no real reason. The shows host and creator Gok Wan uses his quirky sense of humour and familiarity with both women and style to create a persona that couldn't be warmer, I'm usually not a fan of the camp, sassy over the top gay man but Gok adds such an air of sophistication by simply knowing his work and being able to convey the message of body confidence in a way that is universally relatable. In the current series in particular, Gok is throwing in little tips for men to keep on top of their game, generally helpful advice from someone in the industry and well worth the watch!

Another good thing about this current series, the winner of 'Miss Naked 2008' Shona Collins has teamed up with Gok to try and get body confidence taught on the curriculum with PSHE (Physical, Social and Health Education) class in schools. Having studied the psychology behind the mental health conditions which stem from low body confidence (such as Bulimia Nervosa and Agoraphobia) I believe this is a vitally important and severely over looked field of education. Never would you believe that in school someone would take the time out to reassure people than actually, having a natural body and being confident in their own skin is more important than constantly attaining to that ideal body they see in the media. The fight continues to get body confidence on the curriculum with a petition over at number10.gov.uk, click that link and sign the petition for the idea of a more confident generation of teens to become a reality.

This topic ties into My Declaration of a healthier lifestyle, which doesn't just include regular excercise, but the psychological side of simply loving your body and the things that make you unique. There are a few people close to me, male and female, who are constantly getting down on their looks (in fact, of the people around me I think it is more common in men than women) and I honestly believe watching such things as Naked, which recently featured a second look at a lady who had a mastectomy during her battle with breast cancer. After appearing on the show with Gok, Kelly is now an inspiration to other women in the same boat, learning how to love their bodies and carry on being brave, confident and good looking women.

I am going to continue watching the shows on 4oD (a service I have recommended in the past) and keep suggesting that everyone indulges in a little feel good TV every now and then. I'm normally not a fan of reality TV (which from all accounts in on the way out within the next few years) but Gok's show (and lets not forget Too Fat Too Young, the first thing I saw Gok feature which is also a very hard hitting look at the way our culture percieves the overweight and obese individual.) I never really sit down to watch TV these days, most of the time if I am watching something made for TV I do it using onDemand internet television such as 4oD, but I usually set an evening aside for catching up on Naked while sipping a nice hot coffee and filing my nails... ok, I think I've said too much!

My Declaration

Since the age of around 16, just after starting college I would say, puberty played a very mean trick on me by broadening my shoulders. Most slimmer framed men would envy having broad shoulders and the man I would go for is in my mind one with a broader frame (with big arms, but I digress... man I love digressing!) but my frame was the catalyst of a massive weight gain in a very short amount of time. Within a year I had gained almost four stone, taking me to the latter end of 18 stone and giving my arms, thighs, tummy and even knees some of the most horribly disfiguring stretch marks you are ever likely to see on someone my age.

I really like looking back on these pictures dispite my size.

I am now age twenty two, and at the age of around nineteen I started making small changes to my diet, this came about due to my entry to full time work (as short lived as it was.) I continued to lose weight gradually over the following years as I went from one venture to the other, art school, back on benefits, psychology at Bolton uni, a summer on benefits again. Finally came the time for me to move into halls here at the University of Salford which is really what I have been working towards all this time, but being here at uni has made me even more body concious as I am now surrounded by attractive people my age. At the point of moving into Halls my weight had dropped to 14.6 stone, I considered that to be an amazing achievement and was proud of the way I looked, I quickly discovered that I wasn't finished shrinking.

Since the middle of September, to the date of posting this blog I have continued to lose weight and am now 13.5 stone, I have lost over a stone in the space of two months. I attribute this amazing turn of events to three simple facts:

1: It is easier and cheaper to snack on fruit, and drink water of course.
2: Walking everywhere is amazing exercise.
3: I hate being in the kitchen of my house, it is always filled with dirty pots.

Add all of these up and you get the perfect concoction for a thinner Sye, I am still uncertain whether I like this new body of mine but it certainly is easier on the eyes. I feel slightly more confident... who am I kidding, I have even started wearing white shirts now (see pictures below) and it is generally easier to move around. I have decided that I am going to ride this bout of body positive and see where it will take me, I will achieve this by sticking to a few light lifestyle changes.

Ok ok, I'll admit it. I look quite good now!

Food
First of all, lets see what I had a lot of before: Take out, sweets and chocolate, fizzy drinks, fast food... not at all a good healthy diet. Of course, I haven't stopped eating those things, and the desire to eat them is still there. However, here at Salford they are not as convenient, taking into consideration my position (there are a few take-out places nearby, but lets strike that for a moment) and my funds as a student, almost all of the foods mentioned above become impractical. Take-out becomes none existent, sweets and chocolate become a few almond flapjacks a week, fizzy drinks have been removed from the picture (which is the strangest thing, considering those above all else I would have said I couldn't live without) and fast food... well actually I do still have a McDonald's once a week, and subway for lunch on Friday. The most important switch is water, I replace all of my out-and-about drinks with water and that is a rather big chunk of my GDA. That and swapping unhealthy snacks like sweets and crisps, for healthier snacks like apples and flapjacks (shut up, I like flapjacks!)

Exercise
As I mentioned above, I walk everywhere! I recently treated myself to a 'sensible coat' as a friend of my put it, it is essentially a padded waterproof with a good strong hood and plenty of pockets, this is all well and good but I still need a pair of decant walking boots to make sure my feet are taken care of. I have discovered the joy of daily exercise, not in the gym or any of that nonsense, but in the uni swimming pool! I love swimming, it is the kind of exercise that I don't actually consider exercise because I'm having a lot of fun doing it. Everyday my morning routine is: get up at 9am, breakfast and coffee then set off for the pool at 9:30, arrive around 9:50, changed and in the swimming pool for 10am, make myself tired in the arms, legs, abs and boobs then head for the jacuzzi hot bath at 10:20, finish winding down, have a nice hot shower and be changed and ready to move by 11. Mondays and Fridays lessons start at 12, Tuesdays at 11:30 and Thursdays at 3:30 so I can actually fit swimming in everyday, which I usually do. I also do cheer leading with the girls on Tuesdays and Thursdays which is not only a good workout for my muscles (particularly the upper body muscles) but also helps with my...

Flexibility
... that's right! When I was younger I was quite flexible, this came in handy in lots of different ways, it helped me learn how to swim, allowed me to fit into small and unusual spaces, made me the fastest tree climber in Wigan, gave me something interesting to do at parties and helped me freak out my class mates at school.The fatter I got the less flexible I was for obvious reasons but now, as I get thinner, all this flexibility is returning to me but I need to keep at it. In Movement class and also in cheer leading we do some intense stretches which will help me get back some of that natural flexibility that I once had, which will not only help me do the things I used to do but also help me with such things as dancing.

Upkeep and Training
I do want to be a performer, and one thing which is vital for performance on the stage or infront of a camera is making sure that I am as diverse as I possibly could be. In movement I have been learning a number of warm-ups and stretches to keep me flexible and increase my body and spacial awareness. In voice class I have been learning how to open up the rebervating cavities of my diaphram, and learning how sound is created in different parts of the body. Part of my daily routine now is stretching, spinal workouts and voice exercises which are designed not only to keep these aspects of me subtle and active, but also stretch me to my limits and beyond. The more I practice, the greater vocal range, stronger more toned muscles, subtle limber body and spacial awareness I will have.

The Little Things
As men, and anything else masculine, we are controlled from an early age into thinking that certain activities are restricted to certain genders. I am beginning to experiment with some of the taboo's that males have about such things as manicures and pedicures, proper therapeutic shaving (which Antony has touched on before), waxing, plucking, scrubbing and ex foliating and the like which most masculine manly men either avoid, or deny themselves. It is assumed by most men that all of these things are done simply for the purpose of making a woman look good, but in most cases this isn't so. For example, shaving is an obvious choice because the more time and effort you put before, during and after the shave the less irritation and closer shave you will get. Manicures are fantastic as stopping sores developing on the tips of fingers and the skin at the side of finger nails (which I get constantly through biting my nails) and to help those who have rough skin get more moisture into their hands and have a nice soft touch. All of these things not only have a practical sense but also go towards making you feel better in some way, both physically and psychologically (in most cases) and there's nothing like a good soak of the old feet!

Over the next few months to christmas I will try and keep you updated on how I am doing with my new routine. If I find it too hard, stressful or if it becomes something that I really don't enjoy then I will simply stop. Like I said at the beginning of the article, I am still uncertain whether I like this new more streamlined body. I can feel the bones in my arse now, and I have not noticed a change in how how I always feel hot (which I chalked down to the extra layer of flab I used to carry over my muscles.) Also remember that based on my height, I am still half a stone into the 'overweight' category, the very middle of the ideal wieght for my size (according to the chart at www.slimmingworld.com) is roughly in between 11.5 and 12 stone which is still over a stone and a half away. What I may do is continue on my path of a healthy lifestyle until I near that range, which at the rate I am going at should be just after Christmas or at the end of January. Anyway, this blog has gone on long enough I think, I shall post on my progress in a week or so.

Looky what I found!

I didn't know this, I must have been kept under a rug or something for the last few years. Apparently Dawn French did a small documentary series were she interviewed famous comedians, comediennes and comedy actors.

Anyway, I found em! They are splattered a bit on youtube but its easy to find them, and they are simply fantastic to watch! especially if, like me, you are interested in the world of the stand-up and comedy actor, some of the process they go through and how closely you can relate to them and their lives. It really inspires me to know that people who have gone on to have this wonderful job making other people laugh have had grass roots like mine, and also had to work for everything they have. I won't keep you waiting, here is the first episode...

Thats it, the other two episodes are linked in the related videos, and you can also get the full 20 minute interviews on there as well. One such interview which drew me in was two of my inspirations is Dawn French interviewing Victoria Wood, parts 1, 2 and 3. Flick through and watch them, interesting and rather funny

How's uni going?

Lets have an update. My life is now split in two between where I live during the week (Salford) and my home in Wigan. It is hard to split from one or the other now, although I will say I do like having the best of both worlds, it is difficult to leave some of the things I am used to behind, for example:

Byou
I do miss seeing all of the friends I have at Byou, although from what I hear the groups numbers have dipped slightly thanks to a cut in the transport budget. I plan on visiting Byou tomorrow to see how everyones getting on and what the group is up to.

Convenience
I miss my friends here (I type this from home) but I do still see them every week, I suppose what I really miss is having my friends down the road or a bus ride away, rather than merely a disembodied text message or avatar online. There are people I see every week which continue to be the same, and there are others that I haven't seen since leaving for uni. I do not want it to seem that I am abandoning them, though at this point I'm too busy adjusting to life on my own to care what people think of me. Luckily with true friends, you don't have to!

Family
I know I know, its pretty much a common theme here that what I miss is the people in my life that are here at home in Wigan, but I'll remind you that family also involves my dogs.

My Dogs
...ok ok, only joking. I do miss my dogs, but what I miss more is taking care of them, Since my parents became foster carers for my nephew Jaden the dogs have been living in the kitchen and the back yard. with the weather how its been these past few weeks, the dogs have been couped up inside, I can't help but feel I could make their lives a little richer if Id stay here with them.

Everything in walking distance
The public transport system in Manchester is very cheap indeed, what would cost me £1.90 in Wigan costs me just £1 in Manchester and the buses are very reliable, however I still continue to walk most places, in Manchester particularly. This means that wherever I am going I get there soaking wet, although I have treated myself to a new waterproof coat this week, which was a bargain. Here at home, everything is in walking distance, town is half an hour away, all my friends and most of my family are 15 minutes away, its very good for my legs that I get all the exercise as I do in Manchester, but I am knackered at the end of the day!

I can't think of anything else at the moment, I'll take that as a good thing. I have actually been considering moving out of halls and coming home for the remainder of the year, it would be a cheaper option for me and dispel some of my woes but I can't help but feel like I am avoiding the inevitable. Don't think that I am not enjoying myself, because I am, and have made some awesome new friends in Salford who are as I mentioned; awesome. I suppose I'll have to have a party or something to see all my friends on one side and the other!

For those who haven't already seen...

As I promised way back when, I shall deliver. Hot from a Halloween fancy dress night out, its...

...My feety Pjamas! I know I know, your all totally jealous. Well if you want to pick up your own pair, head on over to Jumpin' Jammerz, and they will ship em over post haste (I'm going to order my second pair soon.)