Seeing red

Its that time again ladies and gentlemen, red nose day is vast approaching and I'm stuck for ideas on what to do! I definitely want to get in on the comedy action but nothing I do shocks people anymore (I'll take that as a good thing because I choose to damn it!)

Ideas on a post card mayhaps? I don't know, I've recently splashed out on a new kilt which will be arriving soon so maybe I can do something with that, maybe get sponsored for a day in the kilt or something, I could probably get a few laughs out of that.

Another Idea I had was to work with accents, like get sponsored to spent a day with a regional accent, problem is I'm still not 100% on my accents so I'd probably sound shit trying to do one all day, it would be good practice though, I'll think on that one. Oh I've just had a brilliant idea, hows about I spend a day in my full kilt outfit, and have a scottish accent! then again to the people that don't know me it would just look like either a really proud scot or an over ambitious highlander fan.

Shame I don't have a comments thing yet, Id really like to find out what you guys thin, I was considering just giving in and residing to word press, it would be easier but it would also take away some of what makes this site so personal I think, I'm not sure! email me with your ideas, or ring me if you know my number~

A quick update, I have filled out my UCAS form and sent it out last week, and I received a post card thingy from salford uni informing me that they are considering my application, those bitches! why isn't it a simply yes or no, they have all the information there! are they waiting for better people to come along is that it? have I gone to the bottom of a pile, a "just incase no-one turns up we'll let him in" pile? I'm very annoyed but I think thats just because I hate being in limbo like this, its unfair, I can't even focus on my course!

I'd also like to apologise, I'm not sure how many of you were looking forward to the rambling of an old crone this month, but she's been snowed in since late january. I know the snows all melted, they keep having it sent down from scotland and dumping it over her bungalow, just to give us an extra week rest.

...yes, they've cut her phone wires, I think she can still get radio 4 though.

I'm losing it

I think I'm losing the battle, shits getting very, very serious now. In the past three weeks I've had three deadlines for worksheets and essays, I have a presentation on monday and an essay due wednesday, and I havn't even started the essay. I really don't think I can handle this, I'm drowning in work. My problem is, although I have the best intentions, I can't get work started, once its started I'm usually fine, but getting going is impossible for me.

I know I joke about motivation, and its easy for someone to turn to me and say 'just do it', but it is a real barrier for me. Right now I have the best motivation I can think of, which is salford university, and I still can't get my head down. Not only that, but almost everyone else on the course seems to be getting along fine with things, the odd one or two complain about the amount of work, but they'll also say "I'm going to get this and that done tonight", and they'll actually do it!

Maybe I'm taking too many things for granted. I do have difficult conditions in terms of this social worker and adoption nonesense (if you don't knkow, its a rather long story) as a result of which they have cut me a bit of slack (about +1 week on deadlines.) I think I might just have to stop in some nights and get it done, or not go out to wigan for lunch, and such. I have B.yoU mondays and thursdays but there is no way I am missing this years performance, lead role, most of the story is my own work and its already got some expectant followers, not to mention I have it on my UCAS application already (and I havn't lied anywhere else on it!)

Thats it, I have had enough of feeling like a dick head over my own short comings. I'm not academic, but unlike my brothers and close friends I'm not going to let that barrier stop me. In fact, I don't think there is such a thing as 'not academic', I can do the work and thats all I need to be academic! I care too much about my future to let this oppertunity for a career to slip me by, theres too much at stake to let it fall through my fingers.

RE: Motivation

In an effort to embrace other people's opinions I am going to try and get myself motivated. I refer back to earlier in the year when Antony posted on the subject a short step by step suggestion guide to get you motivated, so here goes...

The Task: Health Studies Worksheet - Perspectives on Health and Illness. Due in: Yesterday. Today's Motto: It won't do itself! (Unlike dogs)

Lazy worksheet, do yourself!

Antony suggests... "Our family and friends have a massive influence on our lives. ~So when your motivation is low go to them for some support."

I tried, they don't want to do it either, in fact I went to ask my dad and he told me to take the bins out, and put the kettle on, and get him his pills, and remember to hand that form in to my tutor... I think would have been more motivated if I'd stayed upstairs.

Antony Suggests... "When motivation levels are low it can be good to list the Pro’s of doing or not doing something. Listing the Con’s also help."

Ok lets be systematic..

Pro: It will be done	Con: I have to spend time doing it
Pro: I'll get satisfaction when completing it	Con: I still have to spend time doing it
Pro: Its a step towards Uni	Con: Its really REALLY hard
Pro: Its good student practice	Con: I could be playing games here...
Pro: Ermm	Con: I have to rehearse tonight
	Con: My back hurts
	Con: The room needs cleaning
	Con: What's that buzzing noise?
	Con: The rooms too hot
	Con: I'm getting eye strain

...moving swiftly on!

Antony suggests... "We tend to want the things in life we are trying to deny yourself. So a good motivation method I do is simply not to deny myself anything. I say: Just for today, I will eat healthier and take my break at work. It is a psychological trick I play on myself verbalised as a positive affirmation. I works really well for me."

This sounds like a great way to motivate yourself, unfortunately in this situation I find myself saying "Just for today... I'll do it tomorrow."

Antony suggests... "Many people only realise when they slip up or don’t achieve the end result. It is important if your motivation levels are low to recognise how far you have come and congratulate yourself! Well done on getting this far! Just a little further to go - you can do it"

This was a nice thought, "only half a year to go" I thought, then it sunk in... all this work and its only been half a year! The nature of my course fits two years worth of A levels into one fun filled year of un financed hell, so essentially what I've just done is the 'easy six months', now I've got another six months of hell! The ironing is looking more and more desirable...

Antony suggests... "If your having a particularly hard or difficult week in terms of your motivation levels, treat yourself. Buy yourself a gift to reward the hard work that you have done."

I'm all up for a treat, no doubts about that! It usually involves me indulging in one of my favorite past times, sitting in the bus station giggling at the screen on my phone and counting how many nosey bitches try to see what I'm reading, but I stopped that after two cautions and a marriage proposal.

Antony suggests... [on religion,]"In this case, you have to be the judgement on how your own religion will enhance your motivation levels. For some prayers will increase their motivation."

Thank god its friday, oh sweet Jesus its only monday!

...and finally, Antony suggests... "If you don’t do that well, start again tomorrow. Noboday achieved all of their goals or new years resolutions on the first attempt. It’s important you just start again tomorrow! Don’t leave it and make excuses to yourself and delay starting again!"

I agree, I'll do it tomorrow. Cheers Ant, your a star!