My First Gig

Feedback time on my first gig, the JOKIN' New acts competition at the Lass O'Gowrie, just off Oxford Road, Manchester.

The kick off was at 9pm, I arrived at twenty to. I had read about the comp on the comedy forums I frequent and was advised that it was great for beginners and there is even the chance of a prize! Not wanting to waste any more time getting into the frey, I signed up. They got my name wrong (apparently I'm 'Simon Woods', shocking) on the forum and on the night, which in hindsight was probably an omen of what was to come, but I'll get to that.

The atmosphere was wonderful, although there were a lot more men than women, and the men were mostly middle-aged or teenage, which probably isn't my target crowd for the material I used but everyone was friendly and supportive and it looked to be a good night. I was fith, on just after a short interval. The first act was abismal, but he was a middle aged gentleman, so the three judges offered helpful criticism and he was off, it should be noted though that it was his first gig. The next guy was fantastic, he had obviously done stand-up before and brought the house down. Third was a scouser who had some good gags but nothing special, fouth was a guy who had half filled the pub with friends, he was awfully nervous and kept screwing up his lines, and told fat gags most of the night. But the judges were generally supportive of him regardless, then it was the interval.

The organiser came to me and told me that the running order had shortened because someone's dropped out, someone called "Simon Woods", I said "I'm Simon WATTS, and have not dropped out", to which she told me it was actually Andy-something who dropped out, and its all okay. So the interval finished, I was nervous as hell (which is bad, I need to be relaxed to be funny) and so when my name was called "Welcome on stage, SIMON WOODS!", the applause on my entrance were the most applause I would recieve all night. I was awful, well, my material was I guess, but I also kept doing the nervous shuffling, not holding the mike close enough or lowering it while still talking, and saying "err" and "umm". I got some laughs for my one liners, but my comedy is based on story telling (like Mike Harding) but it just did not go down well at all. This was fine, because it was my first gig, I figured the judges would see how nervous I was and offer a little helpful advice. My five minutes are up, it was feedback time...

Judge #1: "Are you a drama student? I thought so. I like the outfit, the bandanna reminds me of my aunt who had cancer. Seriously though, are you a drama student?"

Judge #2: "You have some good subject there, and there is potential, you just need to up the auntie on the material, work on it."

Judge #3: "DOG SHIT, GET HIM OFF."

...Just typing that last one felt horrible, then again, I probably shouldn't take it too badly, that judge was making gay jokes all night, so was probably a bit bias. That was that, I left after my act to catch the first train home. On the way home I couldn't think straight, I couldn't have been that bad could I? Maybe if I'd had some friends in the audience, or some support. Now I kinda know what works and what doesn't, but I don't think I will be doing that again for a long time.

Now I have a decision to make, in hindsight I should have got more gigging experience because this one attempt is muddying the waters of a pretty big decision soon to come. Do I stay in performing arts, knowing what stand-up is like? Comedy is the only thing I want to do, but what if I can't do it? What's the point? But then, could I go back to psychology, and leave my dreams behind entirely?

God I feel like shit.